Church Help: Inclusion is the Goal!

I've performed a lot of research with focus groups, surveys, and the like to understand worshipers who visit churches.  I've really tried to learn how the visiting worshiper feels, thinks, and acts.  I also sought to understand why they visited and returned or decided not to return to a particular church.  I continue to research how to welcome visitors and encourage them to pursue membership within a church.  To that end whenever I visit a church I notice what works and what doesn't work.  One of the major blunders that churches repeatedly practice is the art of exclusion.  A lot of churches I visit are constantly working to conscious or unconsciously exclude "outsiders."  I'm not saying that these churches are not welcoming but I am saying that they don't make the visitor feel comfortable or apart of the worship experience.  The majority of visiting worshipers do not want to stand out; they want to blend in.  The problem is that the old model of dealing with church visitors encourages us to call people out.  There is no greater culprit of making visitors feel uneasy than smaller churches (those with less than 100 people).  When first time worshippers visit your church do make them feel welcome but do not make them feel uncomfortable.  Let them breath.  Treat them as if visitors come all the time.  When someone visits initially do speak to them but allow them to relax and enjoy the worship service.  When first time visitors come they are likely looking for a new or initial church home and just want to test the waters at your service and maybe others.  Too often what small churches do is act desperate and fawn over visitors in an effort to be hospitable.  Sometimes members can tug and pull visitors in a million directions when all they want to do is leave.  Or, contrarily some church members completely ignore visitors making them feel unwelcome.  Its all about balance.  Most visitors just want to be treated like everyone else there.  You should have trained greeters who know how to greet and treat your visitors.  Here is an incomplete working list of tips to better serve your visiting worshipers. 

• Do ask them to sign a guest book/visitors Card.  Don't ask them to stand up and give their name/church home.  What if they don't have a church home?  After all they are worshipping with you.  Most people just want to experience your worship service not give a mini speech.  Moreover, some people HATE being singled out and the anxiety and frustration that you bring upon them by putting them on the spot may scare them into NEVER returning for fear of being called out again.    
• Make sure that your worship service is organized with visitors in mind.  If you practice weekly rituals, mantras, chants, readings, or the like that ALL of your members have memorized- please be sure that the visitors have access to a projection screen or a bulletin with the words.  Also make sure that the worship leader announces what's going on and where they can find the information to participate in every facet of your service.  If your visitors cannot easily follow along with everyone else they will feel uncomfortable.  They will feel like everyone else is included while they are excluded.  
• Also, think about those who serve as ushers/greeters at your church.  Are they friendly?  Are they trained?  Are they genuinely pleasant people to be around.  Are they nice to look at?  (I know it sounds harsh but these are the ambassadors of your church.  They create the first impression of your group.  If they are mean, surly, and scary looking your visitors will pick up on that and may not return.  Perhaps some of your current ushers or greeters need to find another ministry to work with.) 
• Make sure that you followup with your visitors a few days after they visit.  A phone call, email, Facebook message, or letter are perfect ways just to thank them for coming, answer any questions they may have and invite them again.  
• Add the visitor to your mailing list to keep them informed about the upcoming activities at your church.  You should have a box on the visitor's card that asks if they would like to receive updates from your church; if they say yes go for it!  

Now you are well on your way to making the best first impression you can with first time worshipers.  Remember, it takes a lot of nerve to go to a strange place for the first time even if it is a church.  Your goal is to not only make sure that your current members are comfortable, but you need to also ensure the peace of mind of those visiting with you!  -Derek A. Terry, Principal Consultant, www.ConsultingDAT.com